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From CNN.com: "NEW YORK (AP) -- Telecommunications giants Sprint Corp. and Nextel Communications Inc. have agreed to merge in $35 billion deal that would create the nation's third largest wireless telephone service provider. The widely rumored deal announced Wednesday would create a company that would be known as Sprint Nextel…"
In a related story, NASCAR operations director, Mike Helton announced today rule changes mandating Sprint Nextel Cup teams retrofit large wings to the roofs of all cars. Simultaneously, Bill France Jr. was negotiating with track owners to remove asphalt and concrete from all track surfaces, citing "Hoosier tires grip better in the dirt."
Kyle Petty, last seen packing large cardboard boxes and directing hauler traffic out of the Petty Enterprises race shop in Mooresville, NC was not available for comment. A spokesperson said, "You think Nextel wants their name associated with that bunch of two-bit, wrench-monkey, moon-shining, has-beens?" Sprint Nextel representatives declined comment.
Outside Petty Enterprises, Richard Petty - seven-time Winston Cup champion - seen jumping and stomping on his trademark 10-gallon hat, exclaimed, "What do you mean I'm not 'The King' anymore? Who the heck is this Steve Kinser anyway?"
Fishwrench.com will be the first to update you as additional stories develop.